As I’ve gotten to know more people with obsessive-compulsive personality through my clinical work, writing, and online groups, I’ve come to recognize that there is a great deal of variation among them. There is no such thing as a one-size-fits all description of the obsessive-compulsive personality.
And it’s not completely fixed either; personality can shift with age and circumstance.
So I’ve tried to develop a more detailed model of the compulsive personality that takes into account its different facets. Understanding our own tendencies can help us move from unhealthy extremes of one type to a more balanced personality, including healthy aspects of each of the types.
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Four Types of Obsessive-Compulsive Personality
It first occurred to me that there were authoritarian compulsives and people-pleasing compulsives. Simply put, leaders and followers. Then I realized that there were two other types: those who became paralyzed by obsessing and procrastinating, and their opposites, the manic compulsives who constantly stay busy and sometimes become addicted to work.
Each of these four types emphasizes a particular dimension of the compulsive personality. They’re all linked by a strong internal drive to accomplish, and to accomplish as close to perfectly as possible. But each chooses to respond differently to this urge, each chooses a different way of adapting to their world within the limits of a driven and perfectionistic personality.
You may experience these parts differently, or even experience completely different parts that I haven’t thought of at all. If that’s the case, I’m ecstatic, because what I really want to do is encourage you to see and understand what parts of yourself you emphasize, and which parts you have not developed.
Healthy and Unhealthy Ends of the Spectrums
These initial descriptions of compulsive types depict only the unhealthy extremes of four different dimensions. Each dimension also has a healthy aspect at the other end of its spectrum. These dimensions are inherently neither good nor bad, and can be described as: Teacher/Leader, Doer/Worker, Friend/Servant, Thinker/Planner.
The healthy end of the spectrum is an expression of the original intent of the compulsive urge. The unhealthy extremes show what happens when the original energy is hijacked to prove value, elevate status, and stifle shame.
And while most people tend to operate in one dimension more than others, they may operate in other dimensions under different circumstances. They may also change which dimension they operate in as they mature.
Below is a diagram to illustrate how these domains operate in relation to each other. When we live close to the center, characteristics that seemed opposed can work together harmoniously, such as a Servant-Leader.
This isn’t designed to be a rigorous, scientifically demonstrable model, but one to inspire thinking about how we cope with our world, how we utilize our strengths, and how we might grow and heal by moving more toward the original healthy intent of each of these tendencies.
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The Teacher/Leader focuses on informing others how to live and what needs to be done.
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- Healthy: They can be informative guides and mentors, authoritative in the best sense. They are motivated by the power of change.
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- Unhealthy: They can be controlling bosses and even ruthless bullies, using rules to control everyone else. They usually see problems as outside of them–they externalize. They can be rigid and authoritarian, insisting that their way is the only way. They can destroy relationships and communities. They may get caught in a Prophet complex, believing they are communicating God’s message to the world.
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The Doer/Worker focuses on accomplishing, achieving and fixing. They use lists extensively.
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- Healthy: They’re very productive and contribute a great deal to the world around them. They’re motivated by accomplishment and mastery.
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- Unhealthy: They become compulsively manic workaholics who neglect their well-being and their relationships. They may get caught in a Hero complex, destructively overextending themselves.
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The Servant/Friend focuses on relationships and helping others.
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- Healthy: Good team players, they work well with others, creating harmony and finding satisfaction in doing so. They are motivated by alliance and affiliation. They compulsively try to meet expectations.
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- Unhealthy: People-pleasers in the worst sense, they may be so attentive to the thoughts and needs of others that they lose their authentic voice and what they have to offer. They usually see themselves as the problem. They internalize. Competing demands drive them crazy because they can’t please everyone. They may become caught in a Martyr or Sacrificial complex, giving themselves away constantly.
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The Thinker/Planner focuses on planning, figuring out the best actions to take and the best way of accomplishing them.
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- Healthy: They have very high standards and reflect cautiously before taking action. They are motivated by security and quality.
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- Unhealthy: They tend to be so perfectionistic that they obsess and procrastinate and can’t get anything done. Their strategy is to avoid failing or losing favor by not taking chances. They don’t allow themselves to take risks and so never achieve what’s meaningful to them.
Hybrid Versions
Many people operate between two dimensions, resulting in hybrid expressions of these four dimensions. These are just examples, not exclusive patterns. Moving clockwise starting at 1:30:
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The Driving Leader
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- Healthy: These inspiring models encourage those around them to be productive through their own example. They may be empathic managers.
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- Unhealthy: The Slave-Driving Boss who works constantly him- or her-self, and expects everyone else to be as self-sacrificing as he or she is. They may have a Tyrant complex.
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The Communal Worker
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- Healthy: They enjoy being able to actively help others and live in harmony with others through their actions. They are supportive in their family and workplace, and volunteer elsewhere as well.
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- Unhealthy: They work constantly for others and may become resentful about complying so much. They identify with The Suffering Servant, and may become masochistic.
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The Communal Thinker
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- Healthy: Through planning and reflection they can improve their welfare and that of others around them. They are empathic, receptive listeners and may help others sort out what they feel and think themselves. They brainstorm well with others.
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- Unhealthy: They become dependent on the opinion of others. They obsess so much about perfecting their reaction to others that they can’t get anything done or forge good relationships. They may suffer from social phobia or inhibition, and they tend to avoid conflict.
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The Reflective and Creative Leader
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- Healthy: In their role as leaders they encourage high standards and thoughtfulness. They may be writers or artists.
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- Unhealthy: These tend to be Know-It-All’s who tell everyone what to do but achieve little themselves.
Moving Toward Health
The more that we can integrate positive aspects of each of these dimensions, rather than existing entirely in one, the more we move toward health and wholeness. However, most of us by nature have organic tendencies toward one of the four dimensions: leadership, work, service, or reflection.
The closer to the center of the diagram an individual is, the closer to health and wholeness they are. The further out toward the extremes they live, the less healthy and whole they are. Generally, people are pushed out toward the extremes when their healthy compulsive urges are hijacked by their insecurities and fear of experiencing shame.
For instance, someone who is by nature very sensitive and compassionate (Servant/Friend) may end up using those talents to try to placate others and not get in trouble. They may become resentful and burnt out. Someone who is by nature productive and creative (Doer/Worker) may try to prove their worth through achievement and become addicted to work, neglecting relationships and self-care.
Noticing the dimensions that are less developed can help us to identify where to focus our attention. For instance, we may work compulsively to please others, and not develop our own opinions and approaches that could be helpful to share with others. Or, we constantly reflect about the best way to do things without taking action. To feel better we need to challenge ourselves to grow, but also to acknowledge the limits of what feels natural to us, and what feels too foreign to us.
Moving Toward Wholeness
Groundbreaking psychiatrist Carl Jung urged us to seek wholeness, not perfection. This makes perfect sense since the word healing means to make whole. He suggested that we develop as many aspects of the personality as possible and have them work together in a balanced way.
He used the mandala, an image which combines the square or cross with the circle, to illustrate this wholeness.
It also represents the reconciliation of opposites such as Thinking/Doing, and Leading/Following. Ideally we develop each of these characteristics to some degree so that they can function together in a balanced way.
While I hadn’t set out to do so, my diagrams of the four types of compulsive grew into mandalas. I hope that they convey the possibility of a direction for growth–“perfection” in the service of health and wholeness.
This is a working model still under construction. I would love to hear your thoughts in the comment section below. Can you find yourself in this model? Are there facets that might be more important? Are there better ways to describe these types and domains?
For more insights about the compulsive personality, read the book: The Healthy Compulsive: Healing Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder and Taking the Wheel of the Driven Personality.
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